


The Rest Will Follow

by cubedcoffeecake



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Rise of Kylo Ren (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, What-If
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-11
Updated: 2020-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:21:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23109916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cubedcoffeecake/pseuds/cubedcoffeecake
Summary: Tai was humming something low and lovely as Ben held him tight to his chest.A scuffing woke Ben a few hours later. He looked up to see the flickering of his master's lightsaber over his head.
Relationships: Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Tai (Star Wars: The Rise of Kylo Ren)
Comments: 15
Kudos: 21





	The Rest Will Follow

He hadn't felt unsafe until he realized what safe felt like. Hidden away, kicking stones into the water with Tai, not needing to press his turmoil into words because Tai could just know; that was safe.

Standing amongst his peers, supposed friends, as they fought him and fought him because he was  _ Ben Solo _ and if they could be better than him, surely Master Luke would be impressed. But when Ben beat  _ them _ , drove them into the dirt with a staff, lifted trees when they lifted pebbles, unlocked the secrets of holocrons and… When he used his power, made himself great, Master Luke always scolded him.

If he pretended to be lesser than he was, the other padawans would eat him alive; but anytime he showed his strength it was shunned.

He felt like his whole damn life was a fucking trap and he'd never even realized it until some masked outlaw had pointed it out to him. Every one of the holocrons said that life was full of choices. He was making a fucking choice to be here, learning the light side of the force. He  _ wasn't _ choosing to be the son of Leia Organa and Han Solo, and yet that was what determined everyone's treatment of him.

Ben was standing in his mother's suite on Hosnian Prime for the first time since the encounter on Elphrona. His chest was full of panicky, fluttering thoughts. He wanted to tell them that he wanted to leave the Temple—but they would ask him why, and he knew they would never let him.

No one would accept him if they knew he  _ wanted _ to try a different path.

Tai was so sweet to him that Ben wanted, with all his heart, to believe him. That Tai would be all right with it.

But Snoke reminded him that the shadow was not kind, and oh, how Tai was. He would never have anything to do with it, and by extension, Ben. The only place he felt safe was with Tai. How could he risk throwing that away?

  
  
  


At the end of it, that was another choice made for him.

  
  
  


"Mmm… Ben…" Tai sighed sweetly into the pillow. Ben grunted above him and kept thrusting as deeply as he could. He was far too tired after their combat exercises that day to fuck Tai as hard as he would have liked, but there was a kind of magic to this slow exchange as well. Never did he feel like he belonged more than when Tai was fitted beneath his, relaxed and pliant and peaceful.

They drifted to sleep together sometime later. Tai was humming something low and lovely as Ben held him tight to his chest.

A scuffing woke Ben up a few hours later. He looked up to see the flickering of his master's lightsaber over his head.

He called his saber to him as the green arced down. The energy collided with a hiss, deafening in the silence of the night. A second later and he and Tai would have been dead.

"Ben?" Tai asked, startling awake and jolting up. Ben watched his uncle's eyes tighten, and he felt red hot fury coil in his ribs. The feeling bloomed into an explosion when Ben turned his head and saw the horror on Tai's face as he stared at Master Luke.

"Ben, no!" Luke bellowed as Ben coiled the burning into his hand and—all it took was a whisper of a thought and the Force leapt to his will, throwing Skywalker back hard enough to shred apart the hut as well. Moments later and his rage was tearing the temple from its foundations.

For a moment he stood there, panting in the crisp night air. He was hyper aware of the way the splintered wood felt beneath the thin padding of his boots. Of the pain in his right hand from clenching the hilt of his saber so tightly. Of his hair swaying in a gentle breeze.

"Oh my god." Tai's voice brought him back to the present and Ben deactivated his saber and spun toward his lover in one motion, just in time to see Tai fall to his knees. "He wanted to kill you."

"I got that impression," Ben choked out, falling to his knees as well. Tai continued to stare over Ben's shoulder, toward where Master Luke had been flung.

"No, Ben. He… He wanted to  _ kill you _ . He thought it was better to kill you and the dark side with you than to… He wanted to kill you! He didn't even give you a chance, he just…"

"Tai, breathe," Ben cut him off, beginning to panic a little at his friend's panicking.

"BEN!" Tai shouted, snapping his eyes up to meet Ben's. "I know you are angry at him not accepting you. You always have been. But  _ I thought you were wrong _ . I thought he did care, and just didn't show it right. We all know how he gave his father another chance, even as he was everything Luke fought against. I believed in him. In his heart. I  _ trusted _ him, and he. He." Tai's shoulders slumped, and he looked suddenly and acutely lost.

"He  _ didn't _ care. Not enough."

Hope welled up in Ben. He lurched forward and held Tai to his chest, knowing it always made Tai feel safe. And it should. Ben was strong, and he wouldn't let any harm come to Tai here.

Ben had always believed that Tai would turn him away for his darkness, like Luke just did. But… maybe.

"Ben!" He tightened his hold on Tai as the other grabbed his wrist hard enough to leave marks.  _ Voe _ .

"Tai?" And Hennix.

Slowly, Ben released Tai and stood. Tai followed him up, not loosening his hold on Ben's right wrist for a moment. They turned to the other padawans just as Voe ignited her saber, Hennix following suit. Tai's grip made Ben hesitate to ignite his own—for the moment.

"What happened here?" Voe asked.

"Why are you both…?" Hennix seemed to realize the answer to his question even as he asked it. Voe, however…

"Where is Master Skywalker?"

"He attacked us. Tried to kill me in my sleep. And now he's dead." Tai's grip relaxed for a moment as he smoothed his thumb over Ben's wrist. Comforting. Even with the distress rolling off him in waves, Tai's first action was still to make sure Ben was okay.

"That  _ cannot be _ . Master Skywalker would never hurt  _ any _ of us. And you, Ben Solo…"

"He tells the truth, Voe," Tai said. Voe and Hennix turned their stares to him, recoiling. "Master Luke wanted to kill Ben because he believed the dark in him needed to be killed. He… It was nothing like we have always thought him to be."

"This place was a lie," Ben snapped. "Now it's over. We need to leave," he added more gently, turning slightly toward Tai.

He paused for a moment, protests bubbling up—but Tai looked around at the smoldering ruins surrounding them and swallowed the words, giving a small nod instead. He looked to where Voe and Hennix stood, their sabers still raised to strike.

"No one is leaving. If what you say is true, you will be brought to justice for Master Skywalker's death," Voe yelled. Ben narrowed his eyes.

"No! We can just talk…" Tai's protests were cut short as Voe leapt at them, Hennix a second behind her.

Ben lifted a hand and threw them back as if they were nothing more than stones.

Everything after that moved so quickly… Hennix was hurt but they could not help him. Ben was walking away and Tai let go of his wrist, but only stared at those he'd always considered friends for a brief moment before the haze of fire and smoke became too much. He turned around and followed Ben to the ship.

Tai stood by uselessly as Ben expertly disabled the other ship and put coordinates into the autopilot. His hand hovered over the board even after he had finished typing, and the world seemed to shift back into its normal constraints. It was just Tai and Ben.

"Now you know what I kept in the box," Ben whispered. "Are you going to stay?"

There was so much Ben wasn't saying that Tai could sense. Death, and hate, and killing, and… everything they had been taught was unforgivable. He had been wrong. People wouldn't accept all of Ben. Just as he was… could  _ Tai _ accept it?

The burn of Master Luke's lightsaber flashed behind his eyes and Tai knew that there was no way he could go  _ back _ . He would be making a new life for himself alone. Or. He could make a new life with Ben.

"Tai?" He tried desperately to tune out the chorus of  _ pleasepleasepleaseplease _ from Ben and focus. Which was worse? Being alone, or staying with Ben as he chose to become a killer? One answer was right and one was wrong and he knew which was which but. But.

Had everything he knew about right and wrong come from the force? Or from the man who turned his back on his own teachings and tried to murder his own padawan?

(It was an excuse to choose what he wanted, and Tai knew it.)

"Of course, Ben. I love you. How can I leave?"

They lay tangled together in a bunk.

Ben played with Tai's fingers where they were entwined with his own. Tai chuckled softly into Ben's neck at the feeling and he smiled.

Maybe this dream would be shattered once they reached Snoke. Maybe then the terror and loss would come crashing into him.

He'd only ever felt safe when he was alone with Tai. Maybe that was all he had now, but that was okay; that was all he wanted.

**Author's Note:**

> Well. I sat down with the intention to write renben, but now I have Ben/Tai feelings. There may be more to this 'verse, because I'm really curious to feel out how far Tai would go to compromise his beliefs for Ben. How much did this shake up his core? Would he be willing to look away as Kylo murders people and take him back to his bed that night? Or will Kylo have to choose between him and Ren and leave Tai behind? Sadly, I think that's where I'd go. Tai actually seems like a decently healthy character.
> 
> I hope some other people are out here to hop on this ship w me! Comments would go a long way in encouraging me to write more lol


End file.
